There are some rites of passage that you expect to come at certain times, and if your toddler or preschooler doesn't go there (and by "there," I mean, they do things that can bring grown men and women to tears out of exasperation) you figure you've simply missed a few hours of beating your head into a wall. No big deal.
The Howler has been known to cut things that shouldn't be cut. (Read alllllll the way to the bottom) but in general, her use of scissors has been pretty mundane.
Then I learned that if you missed those milestones when they "should have" happened, they will sneak up on you.
Tonight, I walk into the kitchen and see long clumps of hair--not the cat feathers we're used to seeing. Considering that Blondie is over, I am immediately afraid.
Whew! The Howler does have sense enough to only cut her own hair. It's Friday night after 5pm. How soon can I get the Howler a professional hair cut?
Friday, January 30, 2009
What's Up With That?
Today was Steeler Day at the Howler's school. (Yes, we're in Steeler Country, but we're not Pittsburghers.)
Last Friday was also Steeler Day, so Thursday night after the dreaded (and talked-to-death) PTA meeting, we ran to WalMart to buy a Steeler something-to-wear.
She told me it was Steeler Day every day this week, including yesterday. Do you think that, when deciding what to wear last night, she reminded me then? No. It's like she's trying to set me up so she can tell me off.
I remember this AM, after I got to work. Thankfully, it was early enough that I could call home and tell My Sweetie where the thing was so she could wear it today.
He didn't answer right away, so I left 1/2 a message before he picked up. I did tell him, and she did get to participate in Steeler Day. No telling-off for me today (at least, not for that reason.)
Now for the "What's Up With That?" part:
A little while later, a get a phone call at work. It's the Toad, calling to be sure My Sweetie got the message. Toad got the message, and called me to be sure whatever-it-was got taken care of.
I was rather dumbfounded at first and had to actually think about what he was asking me.
So, What Is Up With That?
Last Friday was also Steeler Day, so Thursday night after the dreaded (and talked-to-death) PTA meeting, we ran to WalMart to buy a Steeler something-to-wear.
She told me it was Steeler Day every day this week, including yesterday. Do you think that, when deciding what to wear last night, she reminded me then? No. It's like she's trying to set me up so she can tell me off.
I remember this AM, after I got to work. Thankfully, it was early enough that I could call home and tell My Sweetie where the thing was so she could wear it today.
He didn't answer right away, so I left 1/2 a message before he picked up. I did tell him, and she did get to participate in Steeler Day. No telling-off for me today (at least, not for that reason.)
Now for the "What's Up With That?" part:
A little while later, a get a phone call at work. It's the Toad, calling to be sure My Sweetie got the message. Toad got the message, and called me to be sure whatever-it-was got taken care of.
I was rather dumbfounded at first and had to actually think about what he was asking me.
So, What Is Up With That?
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Deadlines
Last week, after the PTA meeting (I know you're groaning, but yeah, that again) I set, for myself, a deadline on when to have the information ready for approval by the principal.
I picked today.
And I made it! I got the information ready, emailed it, and now just have to wait on getting the A-OK.
Then I'll attack the actual work involved in the fundraiser, and getting the stuff to the newsletter. No sense in sending it on until it's approved! I also am hoping to be able to present it to the newsletter lady in a way that says, "Hey! Don't worry about retyping this! Just slap it in the newsletter." Partly because I know how much work it takes to do an entire newsletter, and partly because I am, after all, a recovering control freak.
Tee-hee. Actual communication--what a concept.
I picked today.
And I made it! I got the information ready, emailed it, and now just have to wait on getting the A-OK.
Then I'll attack the actual work involved in the fundraiser, and getting the stuff to the newsletter. No sense in sending it on until it's approved! I also am hoping to be able to present it to the newsletter lady in a way that says, "Hey! Don't worry about retyping this! Just slap it in the newsletter." Partly because I know how much work it takes to do an entire newsletter, and partly because I am, after all, a recovering control freak.
Tee-hee. Actual communication--what a concept.
Information, Please
Last week a form came home from the school, asking for the Howler's name, school, grade, whether or not she has been diagnosed with asthma, and if so, what medication(s) is she taking. It's labelled as a school district survey.
Now, I don't have a problem talking about her asthma, or sharing information about it, but if the school district wants the information, with her name attached, for a "survey," I want to know why they want it, and how it will be used.
I called her school and talked to the nurse. All the nurse was told was that it was "for the state" and she was told to make sure she got all these surveys back.
This is not enough information for me.
I'm supposed to give out my minor child's personal medical information to the state, without knowing why? They need it for undisclosed reasons?
I think not.
So, the school nurse gave me the head nurse's phone number. I called. I left a message. I hear nothing back, AND get several new forms, including "return by" dates. And I get to have the Howler tell me off for not filling out this form.
This is unacceptable.
This morning, I took the first form (the one with no explaination and no return by date,) filled in the Howler's name, school, and grade, and wrote a specific note. "I will fill out this information when I hear back from Ms. Head Nurse regarding what it will be used for." Signed my name and gave my phone number.
As I'm writing this message, the Howler asks me what they want to know...and why they want to know it. Now, if a six-year old can figure out that to fill out a form you need to know WHY, how hard is it for the people who sent the form to figure out that somebody, somewhere, is going to want to know WHY too.
I called the admin building and asked them. They contacted Ms. Head Nurse and she will be returning my call (I made it clear I had already tried to contact her, and am surprised that they would request this kind of information without an explanation.)
I anxiously await her call.
Now, don't get me wrong.
I'm sure this is some useless and harmless survey being conducted by the state to use tax payer money for no particular reason. BUT the fact that they want my daughter's name, and what amounts to her age, specific medical information, and my signature (which implies that whoever has access to this information may use it as he or she sees fit) just doesn't sit well with me.
If it were an anonymous survey asking if she had asthma, no name, age, or signature given, I'd have no problem filling it out. Even if they wanted specific medicines being used to treat and control her asthma, I'd have no problem filling this out. And, of course, if I'm being totally honest, if she didn't have asthma, I'd fill the beastie out and send it back without a second thought.
BUT.
I have a responsibility to my family (and my daughter) to KNOW what the school district AND the state are going to do with her name, and my signature.
That being said, they'll cough up the information, or they won't be getting the information from me. (And, if way back in the dark ages the district couldn't use or give out personal or identifying information, you can bet your bippy that they can't use it now, in the hi-tech privacy-at-all-costs new millenium. You can bet on that as a sure winner.)
Now, I don't have a problem talking about her asthma, or sharing information about it, but if the school district wants the information, with her name attached, for a "survey," I want to know why they want it, and how it will be used.
I called her school and talked to the nurse. All the nurse was told was that it was "for the state" and she was told to make sure she got all these surveys back.
This is not enough information for me.
I'm supposed to give out my minor child's personal medical information to the state, without knowing why? They need it for undisclosed reasons?
I think not.
So, the school nurse gave me the head nurse's phone number. I called. I left a message. I hear nothing back, AND get several new forms, including "return by" dates. And I get to have the Howler tell me off for not filling out this form.
This is unacceptable.
This morning, I took the first form (the one with no explaination and no return by date,) filled in the Howler's name, school, and grade, and wrote a specific note. "I will fill out this information when I hear back from Ms. Head Nurse regarding what it will be used for." Signed my name and gave my phone number.
As I'm writing this message, the Howler asks me what they want to know...and why they want to know it. Now, if a six-year old can figure out that to fill out a form you need to know WHY, how hard is it for the people who sent the form to figure out that somebody, somewhere, is going to want to know WHY too.
I called the admin building and asked them. They contacted Ms. Head Nurse and she will be returning my call (I made it clear I had already tried to contact her, and am surprised that they would request this kind of information without an explanation.)
I anxiously await her call.
Now, don't get me wrong.
I'm sure this is some useless and harmless survey being conducted by the state to use tax payer money for no particular reason. BUT the fact that they want my daughter's name, and what amounts to her age, specific medical information, and my signature (which implies that whoever has access to this information may use it as he or she sees fit) just doesn't sit well with me.
If it were an anonymous survey asking if she had asthma, no name, age, or signature given, I'd have no problem filling it out. Even if they wanted specific medicines being used to treat and control her asthma, I'd have no problem filling this out. And, of course, if I'm being totally honest, if she didn't have asthma, I'd fill the beastie out and send it back without a second thought.
BUT.
I have a responsibility to my family (and my daughter) to KNOW what the school district AND the state are going to do with her name, and my signature.
That being said, they'll cough up the information, or they won't be getting the information from me. (And, if way back in the dark ages the district couldn't use or give out personal or identifying information, you can bet your bippy that they can't use it now, in the hi-tech privacy-at-all-costs new millenium. You can bet on that as a sure winner.)
A Kinder, Gentler Toad
Okay, not really.
He's still who he is. BUT we have adjusted ourselves to it, and life if better. Or at least, less stressful.
First, he's paying that rent, and a little extra for savings. He gets a receipt, and I have a ledger to keep track. Good boy.
Second, his room is still the Caverns, but we're doing better at ignoring it. He still only does his laundry on an absolute need basis. But we're ignoring it.
Third, starting on January 1st, instead of complaining about what he's not doing that he should be responsible for, we're making it more inconvenient for him to not do it. Case in point: he has a tire on his vehicle that has a slow leak. He needs, especially during the current Ice Age, to check it weekly--if not more often. My Sweetie checked it a week ago, and it was a hair shy of actually being flat. Instead of putting air in it, then complaining for hours about doing it, My Sweetie remembered the New Year's Resolution I made for him, and he made the Toad go out in the cold--not to do it, but to watch someone else do it. No complaining. When the Toad tried, he was simply informed that if someone else hadn't done it, it would be FLAT. While he's out some where, and that the guy who made him go out in the cold would NOT be the guy coming to rescue him from the dreaded flat tire.
We've been meal-planning. Nothing fancy, just a plan for the week so that there are no "What's for dinner?" "I don't know" 4:30pm conversations, followed by frustration and tasteless meals. Toad made his lunch at home, and in something like 3 days, annihilate one day's meal plan. So he was told what the plan had been, and how he was going to fix it. Of course, being the Mumples, the plan was adjusted that night, and he wasn't informed of the change.
He came home from work that next night, and while I'm at the stove, making supper, he asks the obvious--"What for dinner?" while looking at what was for dinner. He stomps off, muttering, and next thing I know, he's headed out the door to inconveniently fix the problem he thought he'd have another 24 hours to fix.
No, I did not let him go. The plan changed, and we didn't tell him, so he was off the hook.
Yesterday, I asked him early in the day if he was going to go out and shovel some evidence of Hell freezing over. He simply left, without a word, anyway. Not that I really expected him to actually do any shovelling.
A few hours later, I hear the sound of shovel to pavement, and, expecting My Sweetie, look out the window. Yeppers, it's the Toad. He'd been shovelling for about 20 minutes at that point. (The stuff was heavy, with a crust of ice, and My Sweetie had said he'd be home early to use the blower and the plow.) So I opened up the door and told him he didn't have to do that.
He looked at me like I was speaking another language. "What?!" So I repeated: "You don't have to do that. My Sweetie will be home soon to use the blower and the plow."
Toad trudged inside.
In revealing the 2nd story to my mother, she said, "You should have let him do it."
Now, other than the rudeness of knowing that he didn't need to do it, and the back breaking efforts he would need to exert to do it, AND knowing that if I let him do and he learned that he didn't need to do it would lead to a pissing-contest of bad attitudes, I stopped him.
What I did, though, was to wait until we sat down to eat dinner, then announce "The dishes in the dishwasher are clean...and the first person to get up from the table will be the one to put them away." Toad is ALWAYS the first done. Mostly because the two parental units spend the first half of the meal getting stuff from the fridge and making sure the Howler has a spoon, and is pushed up to the table.
That little trick accomplished two things: Toad sat at the table and participated in conversation with the parental units, AND the clean dishes got put away. Yes, by the Toad. During which time, there was more friendly conversation.
Go figure. Teaching him responsibility through inconvenience and getting him to participate in normal family conversation by work aversion. Less stress as a fringe benefit.
Thank God for New Year's Resolutions.
He's still who he is. BUT we have adjusted ourselves to it, and life if better. Or at least, less stressful.
First, he's paying that rent, and a little extra for savings. He gets a receipt, and I have a ledger to keep track. Good boy.
Second, his room is still the Caverns, but we're doing better at ignoring it. He still only does his laundry on an absolute need basis. But we're ignoring it.
Third, starting on January 1st, instead of complaining about what he's not doing that he should be responsible for, we're making it more inconvenient for him to not do it. Case in point: he has a tire on his vehicle that has a slow leak. He needs, especially during the current Ice Age, to check it weekly--if not more often. My Sweetie checked it a week ago, and it was a hair shy of actually being flat. Instead of putting air in it, then complaining for hours about doing it, My Sweetie remembered the New Year's Resolution I made for him, and he made the Toad go out in the cold--not to do it, but to watch someone else do it. No complaining. When the Toad tried, he was simply informed that if someone else hadn't done it, it would be FLAT. While he's out some where, and that the guy who made him go out in the cold would NOT be the guy coming to rescue him from the dreaded flat tire.
We've been meal-planning. Nothing fancy, just a plan for the week so that there are no "What's for dinner?" "I don't know" 4:30pm conversations, followed by frustration and tasteless meals. Toad made his lunch at home, and in something like 3 days, annihilate one day's meal plan. So he was told what the plan had been, and how he was going to fix it. Of course, being the Mumples, the plan was adjusted that night, and he wasn't informed of the change.
He came home from work that next night, and while I'm at the stove, making supper, he asks the obvious--"What for dinner?" while looking at what was for dinner. He stomps off, muttering, and next thing I know, he's headed out the door to inconveniently fix the problem he thought he'd have another 24 hours to fix.
No, I did not let him go. The plan changed, and we didn't tell him, so he was off the hook.
Yesterday, I asked him early in the day if he was going to go out and shovel some evidence of Hell freezing over. He simply left, without a word, anyway. Not that I really expected him to actually do any shovelling.
A few hours later, I hear the sound of shovel to pavement, and, expecting My Sweetie, look out the window. Yeppers, it's the Toad. He'd been shovelling for about 20 minutes at that point. (The stuff was heavy, with a crust of ice, and My Sweetie had said he'd be home early to use the blower and the plow.) So I opened up the door and told him he didn't have to do that.
He looked at me like I was speaking another language. "What?!" So I repeated: "You don't have to do that. My Sweetie will be home soon to use the blower and the plow."
Toad trudged inside.
In revealing the 2nd story to my mother, she said, "You should have let him do it."
Now, other than the rudeness of knowing that he didn't need to do it, and the back breaking efforts he would need to exert to do it, AND knowing that if I let him do and he learned that he didn't need to do it would lead to a pissing-contest of bad attitudes, I stopped him.
What I did, though, was to wait until we sat down to eat dinner, then announce "The dishes in the dishwasher are clean...and the first person to get up from the table will be the one to put them away." Toad is ALWAYS the first done. Mostly because the two parental units spend the first half of the meal getting stuff from the fridge and making sure the Howler has a spoon, and is pushed up to the table.
That little trick accomplished two things: Toad sat at the table and participated in conversation with the parental units, AND the clean dishes got put away. Yes, by the Toad. During which time, there was more friendly conversation.
Go figure. Teaching him responsibility through inconvenience and getting him to participate in normal family conversation by work aversion. Less stress as a fringe benefit.
Thank God for New Year's Resolutions.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Snowbunny Slammer
The Howler went to two birthday parties this weekend. One, for a little girl, ended with no mishaps (that I've heard yet.) The other, today's, was for a boy and included sledding.
Can you see where this is going?
Yeah. The Howler, yesterday's birthday girl on a two-girl sled and a "bump" in the icy hill.
One flipped one way--one flipped the other way. The Howler landed flat on her back. Which was better than girl #2, who landed on her face. Bloody nose, and trip to the ER to check for a concussion. (I called and she's okay--nothing broken, nothing cracked. Whew!) The Howler is stiff, sore, and still talking about how she couldn't breathe.
The best part? She was having so much fun, she didn't want to call her parental units to come rescue her. Since we had a hot date (last year's Valentine date, as a matter of fact) we got to enjoy our date, and baby the Snowbunny Slammer when we got home.
Can you see where this is going?
Yeah. The Howler, yesterday's birthday girl on a two-girl sled and a "bump" in the icy hill.
One flipped one way--one flipped the other way. The Howler landed flat on her back. Which was better than girl #2, who landed on her face. Bloody nose, and trip to the ER to check for a concussion. (I called and she's okay--nothing broken, nothing cracked. Whew!) The Howler is stiff, sore, and still talking about how she couldn't breathe.
The best part? She was having so much fun, she didn't want to call her parental units to come rescue her. Since we had a hot date (last year's Valentine date, as a matter of fact) we got to enjoy our date, and baby the Snowbunny Slammer when we got home.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
The Twilight Zone
Ahhh, so the meeting is tonight. And I know now who is going to be helpful, but also steal my thunder.
I had my list, and I didn't get to use it. Someone else, who said she wouldn't be speaking up tonight, did most of it (and I still forgot the one thing! dangit! Not a vital thing, though)
So, many of the problems were addressed. And I am now doing a fundraiser (major easy, as long as I don't have to fill out the coupons myself--and, if you read through til the end, you'll see I won't have to.) I filled them in on my other fundraising idea, and the principal reminded me of the thing I mentioned to her last December, and sent her what I thought it could be, all nice and typed up.
Anyway, the Prez is still out--she's not showing up because, apparently, when you break your leg, you can go to DisneyWorld, but you cannot come to meetings. So, she sent her sidekick to run the meeting.
First, let me say that it's pronounced "meeeeeTING" not "mee-in." There she is, looking very professional and put together, and pronoucing this word as if she has only a back-woods education. I know I can (and do) murder the pronounciation of words, but this is irritating. It sounds, oh, I don't know. It's just not right.
Anyway, since the meeting on Tuesday, word has spread--the buck stops here. She was prepared for most of my arguements (even if someone else made them.) She even asked that all committee chairs present please speak about their thing.
Since I ended up chairing the new Spring Fling (which I keep calling a Spring Thing) I had to speak. I mentioned the woman who first brought up the Thing, but who, because of professional committments has had to step down as chair but will still help. I also mentioned that I appreciate that she let me know in January, rather than April. I mentioned the two people who said on Tuesday that they'd help (both were at this meeting.) So, now I have to "get with the principal" to see if there's any early bird planning that we can do now.
Then, the meeting progressed with other committee information, and the picnic came up. They finally coughed up a good-enough program that the principal approved it, and will meet, full committee (not a committe of 2) to further flesh it out. I can't wait. I'm sure it will be, uhm, interesting.
I asked about the volunteer sign up sheets that were filled in at Open House. Where were they? She said that the committee chairs had them. (funny, the Christmas Shop Chair didn't have it last month. What excellent timing, I must say.)
The topic of needing a nominating committee for the Executive Board elections (information and nominations taken through February; nominations in March, and voting in April.) We did vote that in (as if it wouldn't go) and she decided that she and the president "would take care of that." The guy who said he'd chair it, told her that HE was the chair and he'd do it...she said again, "Prez and I will take care of that." He had the by-laws in his hand, and said, "According the by-laws, the president cannot be on the nominating committee." "Right, she and I will take care of it, we're already on it."
He said again, more forcefully, all-but standing up, "The by-laws, that I have right here, say that the PRESIDENT CANNOT BE ON THE NOMINATING COMMITTEE." She finally got it.
She wanted to end the meeting shortly after that, and HAH! I still hadn't gotten all my stuff out of the way.
I had a fundraiser idea, and had taken the initiative to set up dates in March to be sure, if it were approved, that we'd have them. At first, it was "nooooo." Then, I talked about the percentage we'd earn, how I'd handle it (was already handling it, obviously) and that it was as close to 00000 outlay in energy, time, and money as we could get.
It got approved. I made sure I said (repeatedly) that I would need help to get the coupons filled out (organiziation name and dates) and help to also distribute the coupons to agreeable businesses in the area.
Let's end the meeting...oh, no, she's got more to say. God bless her heart, she did NOT roll her eyes, but I swear I could hear her willing herself to do that.
I had another fundraiser idea that would, obviously, be EASY PEASY, because I'm nothing if not lazy. I talked about it (Mile of Pennies) and how it could be used in math classes AND gym classes if the teachers wanted to, and how it could be a 7 team competition with "racers" moving ahead as money was collected. With the faculty and staff as an 8th team, there was the potential (if I did my math right) for over $6,000. (it's just under $1,000 for ONE mile of pennies, and we're talking 7 or 8 miles). It'd be great for next year, because it doesn't have to take a lot of energy--put cans in every room, let the kids bring in change, and add it up weekly. Kids would love the friendly competition, and almost everybody has spare and loose change to send in.
Yes, yes, I'm THAT impressive.
Adjourn now?
Ah, but wait! The Mouth has more. The idea from December. Birthday Books. It's purely voluntary for everyone, but families can donate a book (or books) each year in honor of their child's birthday. The books will have a book plate in the front, identifying it as a Birthday Book. All Birthday Books will have the child's name, the school year given, and the child's birthday (ie Howler Mumple; 2008-2009; March 00.)
The lone teacher who was there was also a teacher at the school when the Toad attended (I won't even mention how she and I graduated together.) I asked her if she remembered. She did. She remembered something I hadn't--all Birthday Books were also marked with a sticker on the spine so they would be easily seen on the shelves. "It was always so neat to see a row of birthday cakes on the shelves."
Birthday Books promotes reading and supports our school library. How cool is that? Oh, yeah, and now I have to ask the librarian to come up with a "wish list" for those parents who want to donate a book but don't know what book to donate.
NOW, you may adjourn the meeting, and go make your scathing phone calls about me.
The Twilight Zone part? After the meeting, I was fairly SWAMPED with people wanting to volunteer to help fill out coupons, distribute them, staple, fold, and launder the things. It was pretty weird for me, especially when the Lone Teacher came up to me, said it was great to bring that back, and I should talk to the librarian because she has suppliers who could probably GIVE us the bookplates for FREE. I have never in my life been the center of so much positive energy. I have never in my life ever been approached like that--you know, pleasantly and friendly, with offers of help by ANYONE. EVER. It's a new experience for an old thing like me.
How cool is that?
It gets better: Miss Thang had to wait in line to get my contact information (it'd be too hard to look through that entire membership list and find me) so, being the prepared horrid thing I am, I handed her a nicely not-white sheet of 8 1/2x11 with my name, phone, email, daughter's real name, grade and teacher (for that ever-important message-through school) all in a funky font. As I handed it to her, I said with a grin (and not an evil one, that's for later) "I wanted to be sure it wasn't going to be lost."
Yeah, try telling me it's shuffled in with your other papers, toots.
I then head over to the principal to be sure she has the other two ideas in writing (and in case my computer crashes, or I drop the ball--she's got it right there, should communication become an issue. Oh, I gave a set of 'em to Miss Thang, too.) The principal says, "This is really great that you have all these great ideas. Thanks so much for sharing them and being here." She then told me that the school's secretaries (the school & PTA would struggle forever without these two!) had a file of PTA things, and if I email them, they'd have a hard copy for me if my computer crashes again.
So, yes, I have MORE to do than I can imagine getting done, but you know what? I made a difference. And even being blunt and sarcastic on occasion (but not tonight), I still made a difference and made myself, my husband, my mama, and my children proud.
How Twilight Zone is that?
I had my list, and I didn't get to use it. Someone else, who said she wouldn't be speaking up tonight, did most of it (and I still forgot the one thing! dangit! Not a vital thing, though)
So, many of the problems were addressed. And I am now doing a fundraiser (major easy, as long as I don't have to fill out the coupons myself--and, if you read through til the end, you'll see I won't have to.) I filled them in on my other fundraising idea, and the principal reminded me of the thing I mentioned to her last December, and sent her what I thought it could be, all nice and typed up.
Anyway, the Prez is still out--she's not showing up because, apparently, when you break your leg, you can go to DisneyWorld, but you cannot come to meetings. So, she sent her sidekick to run the meeting.
First, let me say that it's pronounced "meeeeeTING" not "mee-in." There she is, looking very professional and put together, and pronoucing this word as if she has only a back-woods education. I know I can (and do) murder the pronounciation of words, but this is irritating. It sounds, oh, I don't know. It's just not right.
Anyway, since the meeting on Tuesday, word has spread--the buck stops here. She was prepared for most of my arguements (even if someone else made them.) She even asked that all committee chairs present please speak about their thing.
Since I ended up chairing the new Spring Fling (which I keep calling a Spring Thing) I had to speak. I mentioned the woman who first brought up the Thing, but who, because of professional committments has had to step down as chair but will still help. I also mentioned that I appreciate that she let me know in January, rather than April. I mentioned the two people who said on Tuesday that they'd help (both were at this meeting.) So, now I have to "get with the principal" to see if there's any early bird planning that we can do now.
Then, the meeting progressed with other committee information, and the picnic came up. They finally coughed up a good-enough program that the principal approved it, and will meet, full committee (not a committe of 2) to further flesh it out. I can't wait. I'm sure it will be, uhm, interesting.
I asked about the volunteer sign up sheets that were filled in at Open House. Where were they? She said that the committee chairs had them. (funny, the Christmas Shop Chair didn't have it last month. What excellent timing, I must say.)
The topic of needing a nominating committee for the Executive Board elections (information and nominations taken through February; nominations in March, and voting in April.) We did vote that in (as if it wouldn't go) and she decided that she and the president "would take care of that." The guy who said he'd chair it, told her that HE was the chair and he'd do it...she said again, "Prez and I will take care of that." He had the by-laws in his hand, and said, "According the by-laws, the president cannot be on the nominating committee." "Right, she and I will take care of it, we're already on it."
He said again, more forcefully, all-but standing up, "The by-laws, that I have right here, say that the PRESIDENT CANNOT BE ON THE NOMINATING COMMITTEE." She finally got it.
She wanted to end the meeting shortly after that, and HAH! I still hadn't gotten all my stuff out of the way.
I had a fundraiser idea, and had taken the initiative to set up dates in March to be sure, if it were approved, that we'd have them. At first, it was "nooooo." Then, I talked about the percentage we'd earn, how I'd handle it (was already handling it, obviously) and that it was as close to 00000 outlay in energy, time, and money as we could get.
It got approved. I made sure I said (repeatedly) that I would need help to get the coupons filled out (organiziation name and dates) and help to also distribute the coupons to agreeable businesses in the area.
Let's end the meeting...oh, no, she's got more to say. God bless her heart, she did NOT roll her eyes, but I swear I could hear her willing herself to do that.
I had another fundraiser idea that would, obviously, be EASY PEASY, because I'm nothing if not lazy. I talked about it (Mile of Pennies) and how it could be used in math classes AND gym classes if the teachers wanted to, and how it could be a 7 team competition with "racers" moving ahead as money was collected. With the faculty and staff as an 8th team, there was the potential (if I did my math right) for over $6,000. (it's just under $1,000 for ONE mile of pennies, and we're talking 7 or 8 miles). It'd be great for next year, because it doesn't have to take a lot of energy--put cans in every room, let the kids bring in change, and add it up weekly. Kids would love the friendly competition, and almost everybody has spare and loose change to send in.
Yes, yes, I'm THAT impressive.
Adjourn now?
Ah, but wait! The Mouth has more. The idea from December. Birthday Books. It's purely voluntary for everyone, but families can donate a book (or books) each year in honor of their child's birthday. The books will have a book plate in the front, identifying it as a Birthday Book. All Birthday Books will have the child's name, the school year given, and the child's birthday (ie Howler Mumple; 2008-2009; March 00.)
The lone teacher who was there was also a teacher at the school when the Toad attended (I won't even mention how she and I graduated together.) I asked her if she remembered. She did. She remembered something I hadn't--all Birthday Books were also marked with a sticker on the spine so they would be easily seen on the shelves. "It was always so neat to see a row of birthday cakes on the shelves."
Birthday Books promotes reading and supports our school library. How cool is that? Oh, yeah, and now I have to ask the librarian to come up with a "wish list" for those parents who want to donate a book but don't know what book to donate.
NOW, you may adjourn the meeting, and go make your scathing phone calls about me.
The Twilight Zone part? After the meeting, I was fairly SWAMPED with people wanting to volunteer to help fill out coupons, distribute them, staple, fold, and launder the things. It was pretty weird for me, especially when the Lone Teacher came up to me, said it was great to bring that back, and I should talk to the librarian because she has suppliers who could probably GIVE us the bookplates for FREE. I have never in my life been the center of so much positive energy. I have never in my life ever been approached like that--you know, pleasantly and friendly, with offers of help by ANYONE. EVER. It's a new experience for an old thing like me.
How cool is that?
It gets better: Miss Thang had to wait in line to get my contact information (it'd be too hard to look through that entire membership list and find me) so, being the prepared horrid thing I am, I handed her a nicely not-white sheet of 8 1/2x11 with my name, phone, email, daughter's real name, grade and teacher (for that ever-important message-through school) all in a funky font. As I handed it to her, I said with a grin (and not an evil one, that's for later) "I wanted to be sure it wasn't going to be lost."
Yeah, try telling me it's shuffled in with your other papers, toots.
I then head over to the principal to be sure she has the other two ideas in writing (and in case my computer crashes, or I drop the ball--she's got it right there, should communication become an issue. Oh, I gave a set of 'em to Miss Thang, too.) The principal says, "This is really great that you have all these great ideas. Thanks so much for sharing them and being here." She then told me that the school's secretaries (the school & PTA would struggle forever without these two!) had a file of PTA things, and if I email them, they'd have a hard copy for me if my computer crashes again.
So, yes, I have MORE to do than I can imagine getting done, but you know what? I made a difference. And even being blunt and sarcastic on occasion (but not tonight), I still made a difference and made myself, my husband, my mama, and my children proud.
How Twilight Zone is that?
I've Found My Calling As A Parent
And, God help me, it's with the PTA.
Finally, a place to use all the people skills I've learned over the past 41 years.
Yes, the saga continues.
Tuesday night, there was a "membership meeting" to gather a few brave souls who would be willing to speak up, and brainstorm about getting more people involved (or rather, allowing others who want to be involved to actually have the opportunity to do so.)
I went. What was going to be a short meeting turned into a 3 hour long discussion about the problems WITH ideas on how to fix 'em.
Unfortunately, many parents are VERY busy and are unable to attend tonight's meeting. Or any other meetings, really. And I get that. Working, outside or inside your home, raising your kids, and life in general is hectic for many many people.
And, as I've stated before, ain't nobody going to give up hours of their time to come to a place where they are ignored and their opinions are discounted.
But I have received a clarion call to action. And action is one of the two biggest problems with this organization. Communication is the other.
The ones who can ACT and get things done are not being given the information they need to actually ACT. The ones who have the information won't ACT. Right now, it's a stale-mate.
As I see it, after slightly more than a year of observation, it's a control thing--it's not even an overt power thing. It's about control--can I control this? How do I control this? And how do I make sure I get credit when things get done, and that someone else looks like a slackass when it doesn't?
Well, this is the clarion call to action:
The buck stops HERE. Right here, right now.
Tonight, I will go to this meeting. I will judiciously use my Kicking Ass & Taking Names powers for good. And there will be ACTION.
Before us on the table is a speaker about Bullying. Fine. The business part of the meeting will be about the end f the year picnic. And the membership & volunteer lists. And about fundraising.
And decisions will be made.
Regarding the picnic: the current chair is doing it because last year's chair (who did an excellent job, btw) is on the shit list of the president. So it's a popularity thing--if *I* don't like you, you can't do it. Don't worry, that will change.
Also, the current chair has spoken to her own son, and the president, and the president's son and drawn up a plan according to their opinions of what would be fun. Well, believe it or not, these aren't the only two children in the school, and the other 370 children will have a voice--and that voice is looking like ME. Pray for these women, they're gonna need it.
There has been no consideration for "what if it rains?" and the fact that having 372 children run relay races all day in June is not really a good time for anyone except the winners. And the children who can't run? I guess they get to WATCH. Because WATCHING is so much more fun for children than DOING.
Yeppers, a day spent watching, waiting, and losing is EXACTLY what 337 children will enjoy.
I think NOT.
Regarding fundraising: I myself have presented an idea during 2 meetings--the SAME idea. It's a little-work for us, what the hell can it hurt idea. I'm willing to handle it, it's that freaking easy. And the President just can't make that decision. Well, tonight, someone is GOING to make that decision. And provide the volunteer list with contact information, too.
Everyone has a PTA horror story. And no matter how hard you try, someone is going to end up angry or hurt. There's no way around it. But why, if we're all adults, are we functioning like 7th graders on this?
I'll tell you why. Because times are tough, money's tight, and time is tighter. And very few have the backbone, and the thick skin, and the self-confidence to stand up, speak up, and demand change.
And since I've already embraced the dark (and sometimes invisible) side to this, and I'm good at it, I'm gonna run with it. I'm gonna stand up. I'm gonna speak up. And I'm gonna demand change.
The beauty of it? It's not just about me--and it's not just about my Howler. I'm not just an advocate for HER, I'm advocate for EVERY child at that school.
And what an awesome thing to teach my daughter.
Finally, a place to use all the people skills I've learned over the past 41 years.
Yes, the saga continues.
Tuesday night, there was a "membership meeting" to gather a few brave souls who would be willing to speak up, and brainstorm about getting more people involved (or rather, allowing others who want to be involved to actually have the opportunity to do so.)
I went. What was going to be a short meeting turned into a 3 hour long discussion about the problems WITH ideas on how to fix 'em.
Unfortunately, many parents are VERY busy and are unable to attend tonight's meeting. Or any other meetings, really. And I get that. Working, outside or inside your home, raising your kids, and life in general is hectic for many many people.
And, as I've stated before, ain't nobody going to give up hours of their time to come to a place where they are ignored and their opinions are discounted.
But I have received a clarion call to action. And action is one of the two biggest problems with this organization. Communication is the other.
The ones who can ACT and get things done are not being given the information they need to actually ACT. The ones who have the information won't ACT. Right now, it's a stale-mate.
As I see it, after slightly more than a year of observation, it's a control thing--it's not even an overt power thing. It's about control--can I control this? How do I control this? And how do I make sure I get credit when things get done, and that someone else looks like a slackass when it doesn't?
Well, this is the clarion call to action:
The buck stops HERE. Right here, right now.
Tonight, I will go to this meeting. I will judiciously use my Kicking Ass & Taking Names powers for good. And there will be ACTION.
Before us on the table is a speaker about Bullying. Fine. The business part of the meeting will be about the end f the year picnic. And the membership & volunteer lists. And about fundraising.
And decisions will be made.
Regarding the picnic: the current chair is doing it because last year's chair (who did an excellent job, btw) is on the shit list of the president. So it's a popularity thing--if *I* don't like you, you can't do it. Don't worry, that will change.
Also, the current chair has spoken to her own son, and the president, and the president's son and drawn up a plan according to their opinions of what would be fun. Well, believe it or not, these aren't the only two children in the school, and the other 370 children will have a voice--and that voice is looking like ME. Pray for these women, they're gonna need it.
There has been no consideration for "what if it rains?" and the fact that having 372 children run relay races all day in June is not really a good time for anyone except the winners. And the children who can't run? I guess they get to WATCH. Because WATCHING is so much more fun for children than DOING.
Yeppers, a day spent watching, waiting, and losing is EXACTLY what 337 children will enjoy.
I think NOT.
Regarding fundraising: I myself have presented an idea during 2 meetings--the SAME idea. It's a little-work for us, what the hell can it hurt idea. I'm willing to handle it, it's that freaking easy. And the President just can't make that decision. Well, tonight, someone is GOING to make that decision. And provide the volunteer list with contact information, too.
Everyone has a PTA horror story. And no matter how hard you try, someone is going to end up angry or hurt. There's no way around it. But why, if we're all adults, are we functioning like 7th graders on this?
I'll tell you why. Because times are tough, money's tight, and time is tighter. And very few have the backbone, and the thick skin, and the self-confidence to stand up, speak up, and demand change.
And since I've already embraced the dark (and sometimes invisible) side to this, and I'm good at it, I'm gonna run with it. I'm gonna stand up. I'm gonna speak up. And I'm gonna demand change.
The beauty of it? It's not just about me--and it's not just about my Howler. I'm not just an advocate for HER, I'm advocate for EVERY child at that school.
And what an awesome thing to teach my daughter.
Friday, January 9, 2009
There is NO Joy in Mudville
On this, his 20th birthday.
As God is my witness, he thought he was going to get out of paying rent.
Birthday or not, it IS payday, and therefore, it's Rent Day.
He desperately does NOT want me to see his paycheck. FINE. I don't need to see it, but I'm getting my $25 every two weeks, AND he's putting money back for savings. Whether he wants to or not.
His new cellphone bill and his car insurance will be due at the same time--roughly, if there are no surprises, $190. He claims he got $250 this pay, and has *plans* for his birthday.
He gave me $50 without speaking to me as he trudged off to work.
He's got such a hard, hard life, the poor thing.
As God is my witness, he thought he was going to get out of paying rent.
Birthday or not, it IS payday, and therefore, it's Rent Day.
He desperately does NOT want me to see his paycheck. FINE. I don't need to see it, but I'm getting my $25 every two weeks, AND he's putting money back for savings. Whether he wants to or not.
His new cellphone bill and his car insurance will be due at the same time--roughly, if there are no surprises, $190. He claims he got $250 this pay, and has *plans* for his birthday.
He gave me $50 without speaking to me as he trudged off to work.
He's got such a hard, hard life, the poor thing.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Uniquely The Howler
The Howler has several Webkinz pets. She enjoys playing the games (and is rather good a Battleship and mini-golf.)
If I can, I log in and earn her some kinzcash so she can spend it like a drunken sailor (because she spends it like a drunken sailor anyway.)
The first one she received two years ago on her birthday, was named after a little girl in her preschool class. The next few were simply named, I have no idea how or why.
She got three for Christmas. One horse, one chicken, and one pug dog.
All three were immediately given names, even though we spaced out adopting them online simply because you only get one year after your last adoption for your account to be active. It's a neat-o way for them to guarantee once you've got one, you'll be buying, at least once a year. I don't fault that, because we're lucky that her birthday and Christmas are 9 months apart, and as long as she's interested in playing with the things, they make easy gifts.
But these most recent ones truly show my Howler's thought processes. Or rather, it leaves you staring in amazement that she's got such a unique take on things.
The most recent horse, a gray Arabian, has been named Skye High. As soon as she slapped eyes on it, it was named.
The chicken has been named Chicken Pock. And it wasn't taken. Somehow, I think there were parental units in the background approving names on that one. And, of course, I delight in this naming thing, so the chicken really is named Chicken Pock. (Chicken Pock looks most excellent in a tux, by the way.)
The pug dog is named Cylinder. My Sweetie, her father, began to take issue with the name. I told him to shut his yap about it. It's her dog, what the big deal? Cylinder wasn't taken, either.
But then again, he wasn't around when the 4 year old Toad was given a stuffed dog and he named it Dummole. It took a few days, but I figured it out.
If I can, I log in and earn her some kinzcash so she can spend it like a drunken sailor (because she spends it like a drunken sailor anyway.)
The first one she received two years ago on her birthday, was named after a little girl in her preschool class. The next few were simply named, I have no idea how or why.
She got three for Christmas. One horse, one chicken, and one pug dog.
All three were immediately given names, even though we spaced out adopting them online simply because you only get one year after your last adoption for your account to be active. It's a neat-o way for them to guarantee once you've got one, you'll be buying, at least once a year. I don't fault that, because we're lucky that her birthday and Christmas are 9 months apart, and as long as she's interested in playing with the things, they make easy gifts.
But these most recent ones truly show my Howler's thought processes. Or rather, it leaves you staring in amazement that she's got such a unique take on things.
The most recent horse, a gray Arabian, has been named Skye High. As soon as she slapped eyes on it, it was named.
The chicken has been named Chicken Pock. And it wasn't taken. Somehow, I think there were parental units in the background approving names on that one. And, of course, I delight in this naming thing, so the chicken really is named Chicken Pock. (Chicken Pock looks most excellent in a tux, by the way.)
The pug dog is named Cylinder. My Sweetie, her father, began to take issue with the name. I told him to shut his yap about it. It's her dog, what the big deal? Cylinder wasn't taken, either.
But then again, he wasn't around when the 4 year old Toad was given a stuffed dog and he named it Dummole. It took a few days, but I figured it out.
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